I'm not dead yet! Newsletter Friday 19th December

Letting Go & Coming Home to Yourself

This week inside The Recovery Club, we explored a truth that can feel both liberating and challenging at the same time: you are responsible for your own happiness and you are not responsible for anyone else’s!

So many of us were taught, subtly or explicitly, that being a good person meant keeping everyone around us comfortable, calm and okay. Over time, this belief can quietly wire our nervous system into a state of constant vigilance. We scan for shifts in mood, take on unspoken expectations and feel a sense of guilt when someone else is struggling, even when we’ve done nothing wrong.

Recovery invites us to unlearn this pattern with compassion.

You are allowed to feel steady, peaceful and grounded, even when someone you love is having a hard day. Caring deeply does not require self-sacrifice. Empathy does not mean emotional responsibility. When we begin to release the role of managing other people’s emotions, we give ourselves permission to finally tend to our own.

This shift is not about becoming distant or disconnected. It’s about coming back into balance. When you stop carrying what was never yours to hold, your body can soften. Your breath can deepen. Your nervous system can begin to trust that it is safe to rest.

Alongside this emotional release, we also spoke about turning towards the art of letting go, not as a dramatic purge, but as a gentle, intentional practice. Just as physical clutter can create subtle tension in the body, emotional clutter can keep us tied to old stories, outdated roles, and versions of ourselves we’ve outgrown.

Letting go might mean releasing objects that no longer bring comfort or joy, but instead hold guilt, obligation or memories that feel heavy. It might mean creating small pockets of space in your home that allow your body to exhale the moment you walk in. It can also mean loosening your grip on emotions you’ve been carrying out of habit rather than truth; resentment, self-blame or the pressure to be who you used to be.

There is nothing wrong with honouring what once helped you survive. But you are allowed to choose differently now. You are allowed to choose lightness. You are allowed to make room for who you are becoming.

This week was an invitation to notice what you are holding onto, not with judgment, but with curiosity. To ask yourself what still supports your healing and what might be ready to be set down. Not because you’re giving up, but because you’re growing.

Inside The Recovery Club, we’re creating space together, in our bodies, our minds and our environments so that calm has somewhere to land. Not because we’ve earned rest, peace, or ease, but because they are part of our natural state when we feel safe enough to receive them.

You do not need to fix anyone.

You do not need to hold everything together.

You only need to take responsibility for the one life you are here to live - yours.

We’re so glad you’re here, exactly as you are.

Happy Friday

Sally Bee xx